On May 30th, we celebrated our twin girls 3rd birthday! I am still unsure how time seems to pass so quickly and days so slowly on some weeks, and somehow here we are 4 years into our marriage with 3 girls under 4 years old, and our first baby boy on the way.
Our life could be described as chaotic, or a circus, or maybe even craziness to some, but that would sound too negative for what blessings babies are and what an honor it really is to be called “Mommy”.
I would describe it more like this: it’s an adventure.
An adventure full of belly laughs, too many fruit snacks and our fair share of ice cream (with sprinkles of course), an adventure that the giggles far outweigh the exhaustion I sometimes feel by the end of the day, it’s also the biggest learning chapter (or chapters) I have ever experienced, trial and error..again and again.. and sometimes still feeling like you don’t have it all right or are even enough for those little eyes that are watching you, but still waking up each day searching & finding thankfulness and gratefulness in your heart and yes, even joy—(even if you have to dig a bit deeper on some days) because you were made for this mom hood, you were chosen, you were gifted, blessed, and you are going to be ok. Some days you feel in over your head and some days you feel like you should have won the best mom award for the next 10 years, & that’s ok, we have to find our own balance and our own way sometimes —but once you decide to slow down for a moment, and look for the blessings in the small things and in the everyday things, in the spilled milk all over your table, chairs, and dripping onto your carpet–your heart begins to notice more how much you really are blessed and you begin to feel more thankful too, have more joy, and it changes the way you see this motherhood thing. #preachingtomyself
I always wanted to be a mom. However, I didn’t plan to be this in love with our little humans, to love being barefoot and pregnant, and to love the littleness stage so much. I know not every mom feels the exact same way, loving that tiny stage so much, or the big kicks in your rib cage for months, or having to wake up every 2 hours to feed (or pee) and that’s ok- my husband could tell you there are days when I’m not so in love with the process some days, but all that set aside, because we are human—being a mom to our babies, well, toddlers I suppose they are now (insert crying face now)–this is my dream, my heart, my joy, and my favorite “job” in the world, and the fact that I get to wake up everyday to this dream is overwhelming to me.
I don’t necessarily mean overwhelming in a bad way, however some days, honestly, it can be overwhelming–lets be real here, but I mean overwhelmed with the goodness of the Lord, how he has blessed me regardless of my choices, and my past—he still had a plan for me, he still wants to bless me, and give me the desires of my heart (Psalm 37:4) because he loves his children that much.
Not every story looks like ours, but that’s the beauty in it. Watching each of your days unfold with new jokes and stories to tell, new memories, new lessons learned, and regardless of the circumstances, the timing, or if you actually feel blessed today—claim today as yours, as a blessing, maybe even as a new start, because being a mom is the greatest and most important thing you will ever do.
“As a mother, your first ministry is your kids” -Havilah Cunnington