Motherhood is not for the faint of heart, but finding balance as you grow in your new role is the key to rediscovering yourself.
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As soon as my daughter was born I felt a new kind of love and protectiveness blossom inside my heart- but I also felt a piece of myself slip away. I was a dog mom, good friend, workaholic, avid book reader… and when I became a mom, most of those things took a back seat. Finding my way back to that part of me was a long and bumpy journey, but worth it in the end. It might seem daunting, but rediscovering yourself and finding balance in motherhood is an important step in nurturing your mental health.
Rediscovering Yourself
Before you became a mom, you had interests, hobbies, activities, and more. Now that your time and energy are pulled in a million directions, it may seem impossible to get back to that woman, but there are things you can do to find some balance and reconnect to your former self.
What did you use to do in your free time? Before kids, were you an avid hiker? A bookworm? A genealogist? If you had the time, which of those activities would you try to get back to?
I know it’s easier said than done, but it’s time to carve out some time for your rediscovery. Did you use to make the most magnificent cakes? During naptime whip up some cookies or cupcakes and see how it feels to be behind your mixer again. If you’re a night owl, carve out some time after everyone has gone to bed to squeeze in a few chapters. Early bird? Lace-up your shoes and go for a run while your family sleeps if your former self enjoyed a long jog.
Let your family know this journey back to YOU is a priority. It’s okay to prioritize yourself sometimes. Having hobbies and investing in yourself is a great way to show your kids that their interests and hobbies are important! Don’t compromise when you ask for  30 minutes to get in a run or finish a book. You might even find that sharing your hobby with your kids and spouse- baking, hiking, bike riding, crafting- is quite rewarding.
Connect with others. Find friends or groups that share your hobbies. Join a book club, find a knitting circle, or meet up with local runners. These social groups can help you prioritize and make time for the things you love.
Ebb & Flow
The time and energy you have for rediscovering yourself will ebb and flow. You might find it easier to carve out me-time when your little one is still stationary, but nearly impossible during the toddler years. If you have a pre-teen, you might have a little more time for puzzles or crafting, but as they age and their extracurriculars take over, that free time dwindles.
Do what’s best for you and invest in your rediscovery when you can. You can always find your way back to you, it just takes a little effort.
The Pregnancy & Parenting Care Center is the place for families to receive the support and resources necessary to make life affirming decisions and build stronger families. For more information, please visit https://thepregnancyandparentingcenter.com/services/.
Audrey Mattevi, Reporting