No mom is ready for the rush of emotions, pressure, and love that you bring home with you from the hospital when you become a new mom.
This informational campaign comes to you in partnership with the Stark County Community Action Agency.
Dear New Mom,
You have sacrificed, learned, and grown so much these last few months. Whether you grew a baby in your womb, watched your partner grow and change, or patiently waited for adoption or surrogacy to come to fruition- it’s been a crazy year. And now your baby is here. You are MOM and there is no one like you in your little one’s eyes.
Take a breath, Mama. Yes, getting here was tough, but the 4th trimester isn’t a walk in the park. I hope you feel joy and serenity and all-consuming love when you look at your baby, but if you don’t, you should know that’s okay. It’s okay to be scared and tired- to be worried about tomorrow or tonight or the next hour. It is okay to wonder how your world is about to change (and freak out about whether or not you want it to change). It’s okay to feel sad, angry, worried, exhausted, irritated, and reclusive. Everything you are feeling is valid.
If you delivered your little one into this world, your body has been through battle. Your hormones and chemicals are all messed up. If you’re anything like me, everything hurts. You can’t stand comfortably. You can’t sit comfortably. Everything is hard. You’re not alone.
Relaxing is hard. Getting things done is hard. Breastfeeding is hard. Sleeping is hard. IT’S HARD, Mama. If you’re struggling, that makes sense. Give yourself grace and ask for help. It will make you stronger.
If you’re not struggling with these things and you feel blissful in the newborn era, that’s wonderful, too. Every mom experiences every stage and phase differently.
Advice for New Moms
Mama, the last thing you need or want is unsolicited parenting advice. Even if you do want advice, you will quickly grow sick of it and find that you actually don’t. (Lol)
But let me off some wise words:
- Find a village of trusted and supportive humans. This may take time but don’t give up. This can be family or friends, parents or non-parents. Find the people who fill your cup.
- Ask for help. It’s so, so, so hard to ask for help sometimes. But that village I just mentioned WANTS to help you. And while you can do anything, you cannot do everything.
- Take time for you. It’s tricky with a newborn, especially if you live far from trusted family or you’re a single parent, but finding time for you is crucial to your mental health. During my daughter’s first few days, finding time to read a book or fold some laundry helped me stay sane.
Being a mom is difficult & rewarding, challenging and natural, confusing and instinctual. It’s a weird, weird paradox. You are doing an incredible job. You’re already mastering this, lady. And more than anything, keep tabs on your mental health. Know when the baby blues become something more. Don’t wait to ask for help or speak to your doctor.
You’ve got this, Mom ❤️
Audrey Mattevi
Reporting