MOMFESSION: First-Time Mom…Syndrome.

Washing every piece of clothing three times before baby can come within 10 feet of it…

Reading every baby article that exists regarding teething, sleepless nights…and um…poo…

Refusing to leave baby with anyone. Not even your own mother (who managed to keep you alive)…

Considering stock in hand sanitizer…

And rushing LO to the ER at the slightest sign of illness…

Just a few symptoms of First-Time Mom Syndrome. (This is not an actual medical term or diagnosis, that I’m aware of, I’m NOT a doctor)

Little girl is 9 months old as of February 25th and we have been blessed with a healthy, happy baby so far on our journey through parenthood.

But, it was bound to happen and when it did…this momma lost it. During a beautiful afternoon shopping with Nana, LO gave me my first real puke cleanup. Literally….clean-up in aisle eight!!!

I never knew it before, but apparently, the speed of light comes standard with every new-momma, because I scooped that girl up faster than I could blink. Now, for the first timers out there…you understand and can relate to my horror.

For you experienced readers…you too understand, but you offer support with a slight grin and a shake or two of your head. (Ahhh amateurs).

My shopping day ended with a cart full of unpurchased items, a stripped baby (in public), and a visit to the Emergency Room.

Not to mention, I was not a “calm” patient for the hospital staff to deal with. “Um…what do you MEAN I HAVE TO WAIT? CAN’T YOU SEE MY BABY IS STUFFY AND WARM?!!!” (A HUGE shoutout to the hospital staff for dealing with this panicked first-time momma).

So after waiting less than 15 minutes…we were taken back to an exam room where they took LO’s temperature. 100.7! Which I later learned is nothing to freak out about. =)

3 hours later we walked out of the hospital with Tylenol and anti-nausea meds in hand and encouraging words to essentially…chill the heck out.

Life went on as normal and my nerves began to rebuild until…more PUKE! And another fever to boot. So, one may think I was calm and collective the second time around…and I’d like to say that is how it all went down. But…not quite.

You guessed it…another trip to the ER. But, giving myself a little bit of credit here: her temp was 102 this time.

Same scenario at the hospital…minus the new-mom syndrome causing me to turn into a snarling bear protecting her cub…(I was nice to the hospital staff this time).

And another 3 hours dragged by before we were sent on our way with nothing more than encouraging words.

So…through it al I learned to relax. And, call before you rush to the ER to surrender 3 or more hours of your life. You can choose to be stuck in a hard chair in a cold hospital room while baby naps it off…if that’s what you’re into. But, it’s much better to veg out and binge-watch Grey’s Anatomy with LO in your arms fast asleep.

Despite the new-mom syndrome symptoms that dominated my weekend, I will say…it’s always better to be safe than sorry.

Do your research, but it’s best to get to the hospital and be sent home…than to not go and need to be there.




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