Hey Mommas, it’s another day, another dolla, another moment to breath and another Sunday where I get to momfess to you all.
So let me share this with yall, I switched jobs last year after almost five years. It was a hard decision but one that I had to make. As a mother my heart was breaking feeling like each day was slipping away from me. My heart was aching feeling like I wasn’t present in each moment with my kids.
Now let me make it plain for ya’ll-okay-I am not saying that I was not yelling, fussing and arguing with kids over matching socks, who got the last granola bar, who used somebody’s crayons without asking, and why on God’s green earth everybody didn’t have a mask lol.. I was.. it was me.
But it was the reality that I wanted a better connection with each of my children. I wanted longer hugs. I wanted to spend less time crying in the bathroom because I couldn’t decompress. I wanted them to just know, I was trying. So I decided to take a job that was completely opposite of what I had been doing. I made a plan and I executed it. Now I work from home, which was the best option for us. It was my choice because I wanted to be here. HOME. I wanted to be here.
This Friday I was walking around my house and I just began to thank God for this moment. I uttered the words “I get to be here”. It hit me, I get to be here. My daily routine is what I wanted: less stressful and our connections are stronger. Now, I get to focus on my connection with each one of my children individually. Giving them my devoted attention when they talk. Using more gentle tones when disciplining. And hugging for as long as they want.
I want us all to be encouraged, that whether you are in an ideal situation or not, you have choices.
Choice 1-Be present or Get Passed by. Time is gonna pass regardless. You can choose to set a plan and make it happen. Being present is not something to take for granted. It’s something you can use to strengthen your bonds and be the mother you desire to be. Choice 2- Be Grateful or Complain. While I was walking around my house, I was carrying laundry baskets and picking up toys. However, I didn’t let the task daunt me, I got grateful. Whatever motherhood looks like for you right now, it’s time to stop complaining about it. I’m not saying we can’t have emotions, those are human things we are bound to feel. BUT I am saying you don’t always have to complain. I HAVE BEEN A HABITUAL COMPLAINER. SO I AM NOT JUDGING ANYONE. I had to put that in capital letters for dramatic effect and as a disclaimer. I’m not saying fake being grateful or try to pretend like you’re okay when you’re not. I AM saying that gratefulness and complaining are opposites so choose one. Choose how you want to spend your time, because you GET TO BE HERE.
I pray your week is better than last week. I hope that you love yourself more this week. I believe in faith that you will supersede your own expectations and start living and not just existing. Until next time!