About a month ago, I took a vow to make myself more of a priority. I’m a mom, a wife, and a full-time NICU nurse, who runs on tons of caffeine and little to no sleep…
Recently, I looked at myself in the mirror and was really shocked by what I saw. My hair was up in a messy bun from the previous two days, there were bags under my blood shot eyes, I was wearing a pair of sweats I’ve had for at least 10 years and one of my husband’s over sized t-shirts. I had walked into the bathroom almost 2 hours after I was awoken by my infant to finally brush my teeth.
As I looked up at myself, I wondered how I let myself get here.
A few hours later when my youngest two were napping, I put on my tennis shoes and headed to the basement. Crue followed me, wondering what I was doing. I got on the treadmill and ran. He sat there watching me in amazement.
He then followed me back upstairs and waited in the living room while I got a shower.
After getting dressed, I looked at my makeup, that was rarely being used and started putting it on. Then, I curled my hair.
While I was doing so, I realized how I got here: 3 kids, a husband, a dog and a full time job of taking care of other people.
I had a long list of duties and taking care of myself wasn’t even on there.
My girls are 15 months apart. 15. That means I found out I was pregnant with Tegan when Hadley was just 6 months. I was still adjusted to having 2 kids, yet alone fathom adding a third.
I wasn’t getting dressed, doing my hair, and rarely put on makeup.
Then I realized I’m 27. I may be 27 with a busy life, but I’m 27. Not dead.
Since that day 4 weeks ago, I’ve put more effort into myself. I’ve been running regularly, getting out of my pajamas and applying some makeup. My drastic hair cut has been apart of the process. I can no longer toss my hair in a bun, I’m now forced to do something with it.
Unfortunately, I have received a little bit of shade for my efforts and I would like to make one thing clear.
Just because a woman takes some time and puts it into her appearance, doesn’t make her vain or a bad mom or wife. I’ve struggled with self-esteem issues my entire life, and if slapping some lipstick and eyeliner on make me feel better and in return more productive throughout the day, then I’m going to do it.
I also believe that I am setting an example for my kids as well, especially my daughters; to never let go of your self-worth. You must take care of yourself in order to really care for your loved ones.
Since I’ve started, my kids have helped me stay on track. They accompany me while I run, and usually push me to reach my next distance goal. Hadley has a new love for chapstick and enjoys helping me get ready for the day 😉
I guess my reason for sharing is to recognize that women are hard on themselves naturally, adding all the other things on top sometimes takes so much of a toll that we get lost, but I challenge you to find yourself.
You’re worth it.