It’s time for a momfession…Once upon a time, in a life before kids, I thought that I had it all together, I thought that I was organized, and I thought that life as a mom would be nothing but rainbows and butterflies.
It turns out that I was completely delusional! Motherhood is anything but a walk in the park. When I had my first daughter, I quickly found myself constantly comparing myself to all the other moms who seemingly had it together. I became burnt out, stressed out, and exhausted.
One day, when I hit rock bottom, I came to the realization that I am doing the best darn job I can. As moms, we constantly try to juggle it all. The kids, our homes, our careers, our marriages, our friends, our health. We strive to achieve this false sense of perfection that at the end of the day, if we can seamlessly pull off this charade, we will get a gold medal when in reality we are so close to our breaking point.
I am here to bust the myth that we need to juggle it all!
I always admired my friends who seemed to be masters of multitasking. They were able to cook dinner, nurse their babies, and help with homework all at the same time. Well, maybe not to that extent, but do you see where I am headed? Multitasking has been proven to actually decrease our ability to think clearly, cause tasks to take longer to complete, and lead to increased levels of stress. We set unrealistic goals for ourselves and end up even more overwhelmed with less actually accomplished at the end of the day.
So what can we do to ease the constant juggle?
- Prioritize– “You can do anything, but you can’t do everything.” This is one of my favorite quotes because it’s so true. Take a few minutes before starting each day and prioritize three things that you need to accomplish any given day. Just three! By narrowing down your focus, you will be able to set realistic expectations for yourself and eliminate the feeling of guilt from not crossing all 100 items off your to do list.
Ask for help– “I need help.” These are three of the hardest words in the world to say. Once I personally got past my fear of asking for help, it has made all the difference in the world. I am blessed with family close by, but if you don’t, consider trading childcare with a friend, ask for help with the chores from your immediate family, or even consider outsourcing some of the tasks you just dread doing.
Self care– There’s a reason on an airplane that they tell you to put on your own oxygen mask prior to assisting others in the event of an emergency. If you don’t have your basic needs met, how do you expect to meet the needs of others? I am not saying you need to ignore your family’s needs. But, take a few minutes each day and do something that you enjoy. It could be as simple as getting up a few minutes earlier to actually enjoy your coffee while it’s hot, taking a walk, or taking a few minutes to journal.
I challenge you to stop trying to juggle it all. Life is short, if you blink you might miss it!